The Disappearance of “Mother”

Isabella Malbin was an Art School graduate and like most graduates in that field she had to work at finding work. After many odd, unfulfilling jobs she thought helping women in the birth process would be rewarding and would fit her personality. So she started the certification process in New York State thinking she could work in a hospital, birthing center, or a clinic as a birthing assistant.

Below is a long form interview of her by Benjamin Boyce on his podcast, “The Boyce of Reason.” He calls his interviews “calmversations.” Something we desperately need in today’s insult Twitterverse, where the snarky often vulgar putdown is the preeminent form of communication.

I’m going to preview the parts that I found most compelling and on point. But do support Benjamin’s efforts by checking out his channel and watching the interview yourself. Also don’t skip the ads. (Unless it’s a 30 minute one!). He gets paid a meager stipend for his production efforts if you “watch” the ads. The full video interview is below so you can verify I didn’t jerk thangs out of context.

NOTABLE QUOTABLES {my comments are in brackets}

Isabella: (10:31) “You know, I had heard about this Postpartum Doula thing…so in 2016 I signed up for a birth and Postpartum Doula1A support person, usually female, who may not have medical or midwifery training, who provides emotional assistance to a mother or pregnant couple before, during or after childbirth. training….At the time I couldn’t find training that was just Postpartum {she was not interested in the birth part of the training but the combined training was all that was being offered.} I really wasn’t even interested in birth, other than the fact that I had heard there was injustice happening within obstetric birth and that was women were being violated and that c-sections were on the rise and I had an awareness that there was something wrong but I didn’t think that was going to be my lane.

{Isabella is a self-described Radical Feminist who believes the medical/pharmaceutical industry is abusing women by pushing unnecessary medical interventions (c-sections) opioids and, surprisingly for a Feminist, also by pushing synthetic hormonal birth control.}

(11:45) There was a cultural competency segment of the training which was that we no longer use the words “woman” and “mother.”  We say “birthing people,” “birthing person,” “chest feeder” and then later I was introduced to “menstruating human” and “uterus haver.”  And all those things.  And so this was in Brooklyn and New York City…

The term “birthing people” implies that women are not the only humans that give birth.  “Birthing people” makes space for someone to say “I’m a man and I give birth.”  Which is just factually inaccurate.  Men don’t give birth.  In the “birthing person” space, with language ideology, women are being asked to play pretend.  Right?  To pretend that that’s a woman, to make a sacrifice for someone else’s comfort of their kind of dysphoria, right, making space for their dysphoria, right?  Their belief that they are stuck in the wrong body, that they have some congenital defect, which is just healthy breast tissue, you know, so things like that.

…not only is this factually untrue but it gives power to our oppressor class to say that men give birth, right?  {I told you she was a Radical Feminist!} So it’s ironic because all these women who are in this birth Doula training are there because they want to change the world, they want to make things better for women specifically in birth.  We are only in this position because natural birth and um traditional midwifery was systematically taken away from women.  Women didn’t get together and say hey this birth thing, men and technology they just know how to do it better.  

To say that this thing that only women have the capacity to do is now something that men can claim is totally bonkers.

(21:13) we were instructed {in her Doula training} to not use the words natural birth.  I really see that as part of the pharmaceutical industry to like want to normalize c-sections so what once started out as caesarean awareness month which was like education to kind of like share what caesareans were and how they worked has become a whole really romantic glossy for women to like “shout their caesareans” “this is birth too!”  I think it came from a place of not wanted to shame and not wanting to judge…

{Isabella talks about how pervasive the ideology was in her training and why she hesitated initially to push back…fear of being called a bigot.}

(26:28) How could it be true that my Doula training and the organization itself talks more about trans ideology and inclusivity more than they do about preserving the importance of physiologic birth and protecting women and children?  You know it is so bizarre and it took me a few years to kind of wrap my head around that because I had such a, you know, before I really got clarity over what was happening on like a larger scale and what was happening with uh just the market of sex reassignment surgery and that and the money stuff.  I just, I didn’t go there for so long because part of me thought that there was this small oppressed sad population that needed my protection and if I were to utter the words “woman” and “mother” I would jeopardize their safety, I would jeopardize their well-being and, and nobody wants to be the bigot, you know nobody wants to be that person, and so yeah.

(31:12). So the friends I was teaching with were affirming trans ideology, they were affirming women to take synthetic hormones, if they identified as trans, like no questions asked, and like to even question a woman who had cut off her breasts and taken testosterone for years then having a baby, to question what the effects of that long-term testosterone would be on the child was like “no, no, no, that’s not your business, you don’t go there.  That’s not something you ask a question about.” 

Ben: (33:30) California just recently is attempting to redefine breast tissue as abnormal if this mental condition called gender-dysphoria declares it as abnormal.   This one condition, gender dysphoria, is given the right to redefine what reality is, what normality is.  It is given a completely different status than any other psychological distress or mental condition and even we probably couldn’t even call it a mental condition because it’s so sacred and it’s redefining the world.  It’s very odd that this one thing has so much power.  

Isabella:  Yeah, when I saw this I was horrified.  I think the language was like congenital defect

BenYes, a breast is a congenital defect because of gender dysphoria.  

Isabella: (35:55). When I started to bubble up things about my discomfort with the ideology, people would say to me, friends would say to me, well you don’t know because you’ve never experienced that.  And I would say well, it’s interesting you’d say that because I remember as a teenage girl fantasizing what it would be like to slice off my inner thighs,  so I could have a thigh gap.  And of course my mom would say well that’s ridiculous you’re never, you’re not going to get liposuction, you’re 14 years old.  Imagine the damage that could have been done to me had my mom said, you know what, you know if I had threatened to harm myself if she wouldn’t let me, if I were to use suicide as a kind of manipulation technique?  Same for anorexia….If I were to beg my mom to call me fat when I was like 85 pounds that would have been really damaging.  That wasn’t my experience, the anorexia part, but certainly the desire to modify my body surgically is not something specific to trans identified women….That gender dysphoria thing is something that, or body dysmorphia experience is something that you know a lot of my friends went through and had.  What we didn’t have was someone affirming us saying you know what, you’re right, your body is wrong.  

Ben:  Is there some part of pubescence for women that’s uh, it’s a very narrow passage and wanting to escape the body or disgust with the body or a persistent desire to flee the body is a part of that passage and coming to peace with that is traditionally, up until medical ability to fiddle around with that, is a part of becoming mature, a part of becoming a woman, and becoming embodied and I guess in a way dealing not only with the social consequences but the reality of the situation of being a woman and wanting to flee that as a part of pubescence and coming of age.  And in our attempt to give people the most convenient life possible, the most easy life possible we’re starting to fiddle around with something that’s essential to the process of becoming mature.  

Isabella: (1:02:44). I think there’s something about just not being able to deny the truth of birth.  There’s no pretending…I always say there’s no room for apathy in birth.  You really, it’s something that is so grounding and so sobering and the idea that such a point of truth of humanity that one would be asked to lie or pretend really astounds me and to deny that that process, or to include men in that process even linguistically is totally weird.  It’s weird.

It’s straight up abusive to take these like young (I was 24 when I did my Doula training) these really eager young women who want to do good who want to serve women and to kind of indoctrinate them in this way to say like “you won’t have a client base unless you agree to the new lexicon”. You know which was what was like implicit in the whole training.

Isabella: (1:07:19) Again this narrative, it’s just the disenfranchised, oppressed, you know, absolutely gender non-conforming people are targeted right and attacked, I mean Buck Angel says you know that she was brutalized as a butch lesbian, dragged in the streets, then she now passes as a man in some respects.  We can hold the truth that gender non-conforming people are targeted and brutalized…but that isn’t justification to then move into this whole twisted mental gymnastics ideology where men and women are like interchangeable.

{She next tried to get training in what used to be called Natural Family Planning but has been rebranded in the last few decades as the “Fertility Awareness Method.” Most of the research behind FAM is by the Catholic Church (though not this training), plus, I’m pretty sure Isabella is not Catholic or religious for that matter. But, as a Radical Feminist opposed to Big Pharma, and the medicalization of identity, she is very much in favor of natural processes instead of synthetically enhanced ones that, in her view, damage women. But she got kicked out of this training too. Here’s the story:}

Isabella: (1:18:15)  I got kicked out of the FAM training.  I was already a radical feminist.  I emailed the head of the program and was like “hey this is what I’m about, let me know if you erase women, if you do I’d like to know now”. And she was like, oh no, no, I hold space for everyone and that should have been my red flag, but it was a two year teacher training that I had been looking forward to, I had actually applied the year before and not gotten in and so it was the long journey of “oh my god it’s starting and wonderful I’m going to get all this knowledge and you know deepen my knowledge and whatnot for sharing this natural family planning method with all these women.”  

(1:19:07). I kept using the word woman and mother, um, the first module was the gender unicorn, uh total indoctrination of trans ideology.

Ben:  So in the beginning before you get to the facts you have to adopt this ideology.  It’s put right in the front of reproductive health of females.  They have to adopt trans ideology before they can get to the reality of woman.  In program after program.  Pretty astounding.  

Isabella:  And this woman who is the head of this program would constantly self-censor.  She’d be like “women, oh gosh, I’m so sorry everyone I’m really working on it and I’m getting better.”  But um and then she would say to me privately, “I really resonate with some of the things that you’re sharing like, I also worry about little boys being castrated”.  You know and then totally would collude to the mob.  You know it got worse and worse and we would have private talks and I’m not kidding, I would be giving a presentation on my assignment and be saying “woman” “women” and this was all virtual training so I could see the women on the screens just being like visibly upset and so this kind of all led up to there was a lot of tension brewing and women were writing her saying that they didn’t feel safe in the program because of my critique of the gender unicorn and my stance and I wasn’t alone, I had an ally in the group and then a silent ally so…

Ben:  It’s so weird, like I’m sorry to distract…the terminology “I don’t’ feel safe” for someone having a different…this ideology is so threatening and its so frail at the same time.  It’s just a nest of contradictions.  

Isabella:  And manipulation, ridiculous you know I had this thought too, have these women never experienced real violence that they can’t distinguish between someone who is 5’1”, 110 pounds, like five states away, in a virtual space, thinking that I’m unsafe and could like harm them.  In what reality?  I mean kudos to them for having never experienced real violence but that’s like crazy shit.  

(1:21:34). So the teacher was very much like trying to be the peacemaker and like trying to find a win for all.  So, she decided to schedule a gender forum in which she said she was hiring a moderator, no I’m sorry she said an expert.

Ben:  which means an ideologue, a demagogue that comes in and lays down the law.  Am I incorrect?

Isabella:  You are spot on.  She was a trans rights ally.  As soon as I started to speak women started to cry.  They started to shake.  The one woman in the program who went by she/her and he/him, said “it’s really hard for me to be here” and she was the one shaking and crying and then the expert challenged me to a role play.  And I accepted.  So during this role play, she was a man who identifies as a woman asking to be included in my women’s circle and so it basically was:  “But Isabella you know I would really appreciate it if you would let me into your circle, you know, I really you know I’m working through a lot right now and I could really use the community and support.”  ….At one point then she started to get really jazzed up and was like “I want to kill myself” and I basically just said “Your mental health is not my responsibility.  This is a group for women and I’m really sorry to hear you’re going through a hard time and I have empathy for that and I am not giving you permission to come into this space”.  And then it was just over.  Like dead silence.  It was the end of the call.  I got an email right after, you’re out of the program.  Sorry we couldn’t make it work.  I wrote her an earful.  

Ben:  We only want women who will be penetrated at the will of people who cry in the right way.  Wow.  

Okay. That’s it for now. Take time and watch the whole video. Isabella does not claim to be a Christian. And perhaps she could have handled these moments more sensitively. But watch the video and form your own opinion. I think she is a caring person. She is just frustrated at being asked to affirm a falsehood.

Also, let’s not miss the important cultural shift clearly on display. My research in the past year confirms this kind of training is happening all over the western world. And the intimidation tactics are increasing. Professional licensing and reputation is on the chopping block if you don’t fall in line with gender ideology.

Unless you are willing to disappear mother for “birthing person,” “chest feeder” “menstruating human” or “uterus haver” you may no longer be welcomed as a health care provider in the Western World.

Is this the world we want to live in?

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LINK DISCLAIMER footnote:2 Links from this blog to online resources don’t necessarily mean I support everything found on these sites. But as adults we should embrace viewpoint diversity. And make alliances where we can.

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If you haven’t already added your email to my list, do so and I’ll let you know when the blog is updated. 

Email: blog@blueridgemountain.life

Our National Enquirer Mother & Father Moment

Okay. I promised to update you on the attempts to change the way we speak about and understand motherhood. The disappearance of “mother” is the next rhetorical trick in the attempt to restructure society. If you reached the end of the interview with Dalea in my last post, you heard what she thinks of the latest radical linguistic ploy. As you’ll see in these next few posts, the restructuring effort is far reaching. And some self-described Radical Feminists are not happy about it. You go girls! Welcome to the team.

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Perhaps while waiting in the grocery store line you’ve spotted the following tabloid headline: “Man gives birth to baby!” And maybe you’ve not given it much thought because of the source. Well, now you should.

Welcome to the tabloid future.

“Men” are giving birth to babies! Progress? Well, not exactly. Uterus and ovary intact biological women are birthing babies. But because this story is about a woman who identifies as a Transgender “man” and has transitioned via testosterone and a double mastectomy (but not full hysterectomy!) you get the head scratching headline “man gives birth.”

Which of course, as we all should know, is a physical impossibility.

Biological men can’t give birth to babies. Or give suck, for that matter.

Also, I have a relevant question. Has anyone considered the possible impact on a baby in utero being birthed by a “man” who for the sake of “his” transition has pumped “his” body with massive levels of testosterone for many years? Will there be any negative long-term consequences for a baby gestating in that environment? Anybody swept up in today’s progressive moment asking that question? I can imagine some saying; “well even if it does, that’s the price you must pay for ‘freedom.’” For “liberation.” The attitude seems to be if there are problems for any products of conception, our Brave New World technologists and ethicists will figure something out. Eventually. (Won’t they?)

But let’s stick with the “mother” question for now. As the decidedly “old fashioned” Dr. Paul McHugh of Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine put it in 2016.

The underlying basis of maleness and femaleness is the distinction between the reproductive roles of the sexes; in mammals such as humans, the female gestates offspring and the male impregnates the female.  More universally, the male of the species fertilizes the egg cells provided by the female of the species.  This conceptual basis for sex roles is binary and stable, and allows us to distinguish males from females on the grounds of their reproductive systems, even when these individuals exhibit behaviors that are not typical of males or females.1“Lawrence S. Mayer, M.B., M.S., Ph.D., and Paul R. McHugh, M.D., “Sexuality and Gender Findings from the Biological, Psychological, and Social Sciences,” Special Report, New Atlantis 50 (Fall 2016): 89.”

Clinically speaking, fathers donate genetic material, mothers gestate genetic material. It’s really that simple.

But the simplicity of God’s beautiful design doesn’t stop the ideologically driven from confusing our language to fit the desires of this topsy turvy world we now inhabit. Language matters. Which is why those interested in restructuring society want to change the meaning of words, or if possible, erase some words from common usage. Their efforts are well underway. We need to pay attention.

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Here’s a 2019 NYPost story about the new world we now live in. With both its linguistic & legal entanglements. Trans man who gave birth can’t be ‘dad’ on birth certificate.

The British high court in 2019 would not confer legal status to a Transgender man (biological woman) who wanted to be known as “the father” of a newborn child. The newborns “father” reasoned that not allowing “him” to be legally recognized as “father” would confuse the child and leave the child “feeling different and odd.”

But somehow telling the child that he was birthed by his “father” would not be confusing?

George Orwell rise up! You have another chapter to write!

Sir Andrew McFarlane, the president of the high court’s family division, said…that “motherhood” denoted pregnancy and birth, regardless of how the individual is seen in the eyes of the law, the Guardian reported.

“There is a material difference between a person’s gender and their status as a parent. Being a ‘mother,’ whilst hitherto always associated with being female, is the status afforded to a person who undergoes the physical and biological process of carrying a pregnancy and giving birth,” McFarlane said.

“It is now medically and legally possible for an individual, whose gender is [recognized] in law as male, to become pregnant and give birth to their child. Whilst that person’s gender is ‘male,’ their parental status, which derives from their biological role in giving birth, is that of ‘mother,’ ” he concluded.

The Trans Activists were not happy with that 2019 high court ruling and may have successfully overturned it in the UK by now. I don’t know.

Does redefining motherhood & fatherhood in this way sound reasonable to you?

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My next post documents the disappearance of “mother” in our nations hospitals and birthing centers. We’ll hear the testimony of someone trained in the field. Until she was kicked out of the field for standing up to the Gender Ideologues.

Finally to my Christian brothers and sisters. A word of caution and encouragement. We must love people who are confused. But we can’t affirm their confusion, nor the confused language their anti-creational ideology says we must adopt. Today, in the state of California, health care workers can be criminally prosecuted for using the wrong pronoun. I’m sure any prosecution couldn’t withstand constitutional scrutiny. (At least for now.). Perhaps the real purpose of the statute is to drive “uncaring” people out of Health Care in California. But the point is that the power of the State is brought to bear on someone violating a speech code. Ironic, isn’t it? In this age of expressive individualism.

Is this the world we want to live in?

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If you’ve just found my blog and are intrigued about the issue and want to learn more, I highly recommend a book by Abigail Shrier.

Shrier is a graduate of Columbia College who went on to earn a bachelor of philosophy degree from the University of Oxford and a JD from Yale Law School.  Her book Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters was named a “best book” by The Economist and The Times of London. [2020, 2021]

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If you haven’t already added your email to my list, do so and I’ll let you know when the blog is updated. 

Email: blog@blueridgemountain.life

Gender Activists Appropriate DSD’s

Her name is Dalea Rundblad. She was born with a rare DSD (Disorder of Sexual Development). In the video interview below she explains both her condition, Complete Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome (CAIS), her struggles, and her deep concern that “extreme” Gender Activists are using her condition as well as other DSD’s to denounce the male – female binary. Also, believe it or not, the Gender Ideologues are coming after the word “mother.” You’ll need to watch the end of the video to hear what she has to say about that.

Like I said in a previous post, the radicals behind the Gender Identity & Expression movement want to fundamentally restructure society. (Not everyone supporting the GI&E movement is a radical, but they are misinformed.) Attacking a word like “mother” on the grounds that the word is not “inclusive” enough is just one of many radical tactics being used. More about this specific attack in a future post.

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Gender Ideologues lump all DSD’s into a category called “intersex.” You might remember that category from a previous post where I discussed what our children are being taught in elementary school. Check out the Gender Unicorn here in the “Sex Assigned at Birth” section to see what I mean. [If you want more information on how Activists misuse DSD’s to further their agenda, see this post.]

Below is a long-form interview, slow at parts, but still informative. And very inspiring. Unfortunately, informing yourself about today’s Radical Disembody Movement is going to require more than a 60 second soundbite or 280 character Twitter feed if you want to get your brain around the issue. Plus these long form interviews help to humanize a very dehumanizing cultural moment. A cultural moment filled with people who have been convinced that personal fulfillment involves escape from the bodies they were given. As I search the internet for compelling content I will offer more of these in the future.

I encourage you to spend time educating yourself about this issue. I hope to help you do that. I’ve used the word “radical” more times than I feel comfortable doing. But I’m convinced we’ve reached an important cultural tipping point. My prayer is that we lean back. And seriously reconsider the world we want to live in.

I’m encouraged by the fact that many Gays and Lesbians, self-described Radical Feminists, and more on the political Left, are finally recognizing we have marched across a “bridge too far” in our efforts to reach the marginalized. We need to retrace our steps. Admittedly a hard thing for “progressives” to do. But increasingly “progressives” are saying “wait, wait, biology is not bigotry.” And they are finally speaking out. As a result, tension between the LGB and the TQ+ is growing. We will look at this development in future posts. Some rather strange alliances across the political spectrum, Radical Feminists joining Cultural Conservatives, offers hope that the tipping point may yet be averted. If we come to our senses together.

But unfortunately the louder Transgender “Queer” Activists still receive most of the media coverage. And far far too many leaders of our cultural institutions are listening to the “loud and vulgar” among us. Dalea wants them to listen to her too. But will they? As you’ll see she is far from loud and vulgar.

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I’ve taken the liberty to highlight some of the compelling parts of Dalea’s interview below. The place in the timeline is noted in case you want to fast forward (or rewind) to those points.

FYI: YouTube will only pay the content provider, the interviewer, if you “watch” the ads during the video playback. So do him the favor of not skipping those ads when they appear. Go get a swig of your favorite beverage and then return. Let the ads play on.

Now to the interview.

I just love this woman. Her tenacity and positive attitude in spite of her “condition” is inspiring. She doesn’t use the word disorder but she doesn’t push back when the interviewer uses that word. She is clearly more concerned with the extremist Gender Ideologues who have appropriated DSD’s for their own far-reaching agenda. I echo here what I said in a previous post:

We should respect and care for those who have these disorders but let’s not ignore the obvious. We should embrace them and recognize their often heroic efforts and celebrate the tenacity with which many of them live their lives, but we should not lie to them or pretend that they don’t have a problem.

You can tell Dalea is tired of the lies too. And she has dedicated her life to both educating and assisting the uninformed and the marginalized. You will be informed and inspired.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1fMUDmvins

NOTABLE QUOTABLES:

Dalea:  (3:55) I think I should explain to viewers that don’t know me or my condition…all of that.  I was born with a condition called complete androgen insensitivity syndrome (CAIS).  And don’t worry I will explain.  It is a condition where a female looking girl is born without a uterus and she is born with internal gonads.  And she has an XY chromosome which usually throws people for a loop, as it did with my mother. She was very worried and very confused because a lot of times with pregnant women they go for their tests and they do amniotic tests they can assert the expected sex of the baby right.  So they told her, you’re having a boy.  

Dalea: (5:55) It was very difficult because there is so much ignorance about this condition and now especially now with all the um very extreme activists calling everybody intersex it’s become even more difficult to differentiate what is what and what are we talking about here.  Because when you put everything into a cube and you have different colors of different situations and different experiences and you put everything together and you say this is what this is, we’re fighting for everybody and that just doesn’t work that way it really doesn’t.  Especially when our conditions are used for financial gain, for advancement…how?  Well to start, to begin with a lot of the not-for profit people out there, yeah, they may not be making profit but people are getting paid for talking, also aligning with the LGBT community where what we have has nothing to do with uh the rainbow and I will explain why in my opinion this is happening (later)…

Dalea: (9:36)  [Women with my condition usually don’t talk about it.  They hide it.]. This is what I did.  I was my mother’s Achilles heel.  She had an imperfect baby and I was always under scrutiny and I was homeschooled for a while…she didn’t want to really deal with me and my problems.  I had to frequently go to the doctor.  I had additional problems because of a medication my mom took during her pregnancy.  So this added a little bit more to my already difficult beginning of my life.  But I want to clarify that it’s not…some doctors think that it’s because of that medication that I have this condition, but I want to clarify that it’s not the case.  It could have been a trigger but women that have CAIS are born in families without having to have any external medication or anything like that it just happens and it happens to run in families.

Ben:  (10:44) Just to clarify.  Everyone in utero begins as a female and then the testosterone triggers the masculinization of the baby into a boy.  So you were primed on a genetic level to become a boy but because there is something in your body that doesn’t metabolize testosterone or androgens you maintained the female but you didn’t you but I guess you didn’t develop the female reproductive system, it just didn’t, it stayed in a certain spot without going somewhere?

Dalea:  I can elaborate on that…for me to do the work that I do helping young girls that a lot of the times they’re suicidal because we happen to find out about this when our periods don’t come right, a lot of us.  And then they go to the doctor and then the doctor tells them well you’re really part man.  You know.  Or they’re really a man.  Stupid things like that.  Or the newest one.  You are Intersex.  

What happens with women, with us.  I spoke with a couple geneticists so that I could learn how to explain it the best way.  Just like as you so wisely said everyone starts as a female as an embryo because we come from a female.  The XY chromosome.  The Y chromosome itself has a gene called SRY.  The function of this gene, SRY, is responsible for sending testosterone signals to the body so that the individual then changes into a male as it continues to grow right.  So XX is female they don’t have a Y chromosome with the SRY gene.  XY is a potential male.  In order for that XY individual to develop as a male and be born with the body of a typical male, that SRY gene has to function.  In our case it doesn’t function.  So when it doesn’t function it cannot send the signal, “hey wait a minute I want to make this female into a boy” and we end up being born with what I call a “relic” or what could have been the Y chromosome.  And then we are born with a normal vagina and a vaginal canal and all of that but no uterus and then our we have internal gonads so typically they are producing enough, it’s called aromatization.  This gonads will produce testosterone which our body turns into estrogen.  Yeah, it’s very interesting so whenever it’s possible to leave them inside it’s fine because we just operate like any other girl right.

What happens a lot of times because they think that we are going to get cancer if they don’t take them out, they take them out, and then of course we have to start taking hormones, hormone replacement, right.  So our body has no ability to process testosterone on top of it all…so you know when I hear from people, I hear this all the time online as a way to insult me.  Oh, you’re really a man…I do this work.  I release videos and I do whatever I can to bring awareness and some sanity to all of this because it’s just insane.  I’m just, I don’t even know what to say anymore, I’m crazy…and they fail to understand I could have been, but I am not and by seeing my Y chromosome I can see there was a potential for my body to you know our bodies such complex, I, I guess I’ll call them machines, they’re not machines, they are a divine creation, something very beautiful and very special and it shows us when something clicks in a different way, so many repercussions can happen, right?  So that’s this is why I’m very careful to be judgmental of people who are different than myself because who knows what’s happening but because of the things that I suffer as a child and as a teenager…there was something inside of me that said, you need to talk about it.  

There are girls out there who feel like you that they are all alone and there are only this crazy extreme people that they call themselves intersex and they’re just muddying the waters for these fragile little girls who need to feel accepted…to blend in…to be not too different that you have to be singled out somehow…

[16:55 TO 31:00 is very inspirational.]

When the interviewer asked her why she began to look for other women like herself she responded:

Dalea:  (31:20) I had begun to see a lot of talk and movement on the activist arena and some things were very distasteful to me.  And I said well I need to just try to focus and so I found some groups online but I quickly discovered that mostly they are the most loudest and most venerated speakers or activists (I hate the word activist!). I’m an educator.  I’m not an activist….But they were all gay or identified as queer.  And they were the ones that are the loudest and the most vulgar.  Because I find a lot of it to be very very vulgar.  I had seen a video of a girl (once I joined the group) who has what I have and she was referring to her gonads in a very horrible masculine way completely disregarding all the straight girls because that’s what happens.  You know, just like in the regular population, we are like regular women and some of us will be gay, of course,…but I’ve noticed that it’s an emphasis on the gay um interlacing

Ben: intersectionality is the term. 

Thank you.  That I’m not very versed on…so there’s nothing wrong with being gay and diversity is beautiful however when you have only a segment of the population talking about your life, that’s not right to me.  When you have language that is not very polished and very vulgar, I am against that because there are gentle flowers out there, 14 year olds, 13 year olds that are just discovering that they have this, this uh, condition.  [She has had emails and phone calls with girls who] do not want to reach out to these established, uh activist organizations because they are “that’s not me.”  (34:54) “You know, I’m just a girl, I don’t have to have a third gender, that doesn’t exist! I don’t like the words they use.  But the problem with all of this is, I’m taking one for the team.  Because they can’t speak without giving their medical history away….I know actresses in Hollywood that I know who are blockbuster who have it, they don’t talk about it, politician(s)..people living their best life, you know they may be adopting kids instead of having them themselves…they don’t come forward, because it comes at a price.  If you google me the first thing you will see is “intersex” woman, I am nothing else but that.  What about what about my value as a human being?  I am a woman.  And I have a condition but, listen, if you become an adult and you are a wrong adult and you want to call yourself intersex or helicopter or lizard, go for it live your best life, but to just label our children you are cutting their wings.  

Dalea: (39:20) I call it variations of sex development.  And they just have a blanket statement most of the very strong activists they call it intersex for everything, so you have no idea what anybody has or and they’re just everything is intersex or a third gender, which I’m not thank you.  It doesn’t exist.  They confuse mythology with history…

Ben: that’s a good one, confusing mythology for history.

Dalea: yes they do, they think its science, but it is not true….I also really recoil against have you ever seen this, the cookie with all the genders and all these things and okay they also have this graph where at one side they have a guy a male on the other side they have a female and then in the middle they have what they are calling intersex or middle sex…

Ben: or non-binary

Dalea: right and as you get closer to the center they say that’s the degree of how non-binary you are and it surprises me that this is endorsed and that everybody is passing it around as if it’s something possible.  

(42:30) Just because you have masculine qualities as a woman or feminine qualities as a man doesn’t mean you have become a middlesex and a new gender, okay and that’s my contention.  I don’t know how you feel.

Ben:  What I’ve been calling the rainbow crowd, while there are people that are being represented and you know sexualities and different lifestyles that are being represented by that rainbow originally that was what the rainbow was for, but it has been captured by a specific ideology that takes sexuality and gender and biology and just mixes it all up and adds all this stuff called post-modern theory and critical theory to it and in effect what it does in the case with people with conditions like yours which is not a sexuality and it’s not a gender its a physical condition that has to do with sexual organs and sexual development but also the development of every other aspect of the body because we’re not just sexed creatures, that our sex actually informs a lot of our development.  But they’ll appropriate you, they’ll call you intersex, they’ll appropriate you and say well I’m like intersex but in the Genderland and in the process of doing that and with the power that they have, with social capital they’re completely erasing those people with a sexual developmental disorder, I’m sorry to use the word intersex but like the condition of that entire set of 40 or 50 conditions are being used as a political ploy.  And then the understanding of that by the populace at large is covered up and then the medical help in the medical industry which is completely adopting this gender ideology is also not able to help you any better than before this stuff came along.  

Dalea:  (45:08) Yes, bravo, we have specific medical needs for girls with CAIS there’s a slight variation to it called PAIS (partial androgen insensitivity syndrome) where its kind of like us but not 100 percent and those girls are born with more differences that are visible on the outside, right and so that, if we just get put into this melting pot of just everything goes I mean there are just people that are just calling themselves intersex just because they like to wear lipstick and high heels and they’re a guy.  So it’s losing all, in my opinion, it has no meaning anymore. Also, I was very sad to see recently how activism it’s coming after the most sacred of words “mother”.  I’ve heard that they are fighting to change it and call them birthing people and sometimes I feel like I’m watching an American Horror Story Show because I don’t understand we all come from a mother how can we do away with such words?  …We should not have to change everything to accommodate some people’s lifestyles and choices.

Ben:  The people who would have us change everything aren’t respecting people such as you.  They don’t respect women.  They don’t respect motherhood.  They don’t respect people with actual physical conditions, they don’t even respect gays and lesbians because they think that a lesbian should sleep with a man if the man calls himself a woman.  They’re the ones who want everybody to respect them and they respect no one at all.  

Dalea:  (50:20) Let’s not forget the family nucleus is valuable.  Just because we have other lifestyles doesn’t mean we have to dismantle the family…

Ben:  There are aspects of the family and tradition that can get pretty ugly, so how do we move in the direction of acceptance without moving in the directions of dismantling, in other words what would you want society at large to better understand about people specifically young females with your condition, how to treat them.

Dalea:  (51:30) First of all I want them to know it is not a choice we make.  We are born with a genetic condition that we have no control over and we are not men.  The fact that we have a Y chromosome only means that there is a relic in our attic that shows that we could have been should the SRY gene have been doing the right thing, right.  So it only means we could have been.  But we want to live for the most part…normal lives.  We are productive members of society…regular women have a little testosterone in them but we have zero, none you can pump me up with testosterone if I try to be a body builder and all you’ll do is pump me with more estrogen because my body will just convert it to more estrogen so we have no testosterone.  The process is called aromatization.  How the body converts testosterone into more estrogen.

Ben:  does it create an androgynous body type then this inability to process any testosterone?

Dalea:  On the contrary we’re all women.  We are so feminine.  I don’t grow body hair.  I have never had to shave my legs….our skin is typically we have very beautiful skin, nice skin, our hair grows and we are very delicate…we tend to be a little taller.  We have very little masculine in us.  

She clearly wants to maintain the male – female sex binary.  There is no third sex.  She’s right.

Finally to my Christian brothers and sisters, when reaching out to those who say they have gender-dysphoria, the vast majority of whom do not have a DSD like Dalea, Embrace, Don’t Affirm.

Ephesians 4:25 (NRSV): So then, putting away falsehood, let all of us speak the truth to our neighbors…

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